10TH MEETNG: PEER PRESSURE (READINGS)

The word conformity comes from the root word “conform” which means do as others do, adapt, comply, be or become similar, to be in agreement, to act in accordance. Conformity therefore refers to a person’s wish or desire to be like everyone else, to do what everybody does, to wear what the majority wears, to speak the way other people speak. In vernacular, to conform means gusto natin maging “in” sa grupo, gusto natin sumunod sa uso or in terms of relating with other people, nakikisama tayo, nakikigaya sa karamihan. Conformity becomes a problem when you start giving in to that familiar saying that goes “when you’re not in, you’re out”, when you begin to have difficulty maintaining your own belief in the face of others, when you begin accepting other people’s ideas even if you do not fully agree with them. You conform because you want to be accepted, you are afraid to be different from the majority. Takot kang maging iba, Takot masabihan o mapagtawanan ng iba. Part of growing up is learning to stand for what you believe in and not on what others are doing or saying.


“Pakikisama” as a form of “pakikipagkapwa” in our culture is just one of the many levels and modes of social interaction we use in relating with other people. And for teenagers like you, pakikisama is important in relating with your barkada or peer group. And most of the time, the young Filipino teen is put into great pressure na makisama or else KJ ka or di ka “in” sa grupo or “boring ka”. Whatever the reason, whatever the circumstances, the usual result is that the teen would rather “give in” and conform to what the barkada wants rather than to be labeled KJ or worst to become an outcast or walang kabarkada. Teenagers nowadays call those teen who cause trouble “BI or Bad Influence”. And although some could resist, most of the time teen have difficulty saying “NO” to these pressures.

One reason why conformity is dangerous is that more often than not, it can cause a person to do wrong things or it can lead a person to do dangerous things like smoking, taking drugs, drinking liquor, joining fraternities or gangs, or even rob someone. When a person doesn’t have the courage to be different and take a stand on his own values and beliefs, that person becomes an easy prey or target of PEER PRESSURE and that person can easily be swayed or persuaded to do things he doesn’t want to do in the first place. That’s why it is important to have real friends, people whom you can trust and depend on no matter what, people who listen and care enough to understand your strength and weaknesses, and people who believed and accept you for what you are.

Peer pressure is a social force exerted by a group or powerful/admired individual within a group. It is generally a pressure to conform to a social norm within any given group. Not all peer pressure is bad. Social norms are a very important part of human interaction and group dynamics. Social norms are expectations that a group has of its members usually related to behavior. Since most social norms contribute to the smooth interaction of individuals within a society, peer pressure that promotes conforming to these norms serves a positive purpose. When social norms become deviant or harmful or when the social norms in a group are radically different to the generally accepted social norms of a society, then we consider them to be "bad". When most people think of peer pressure they are thinking of the pressure to conform to a deviant behavior set. Things like drug use, underage alcohol use, promiscuous sexual conduct, violent or aggressive acting out, or criminal behavior are examples of the negative peer pressure associated with teens.

(Source: Making a Difference for Teens, Lito S. Jara, 1998)